How Do You Grieve the Loss of a Loved One (Dealing with Grief)?
Updated: Sep 18
TABLE OF CONTENT
Dealing with grief, loss or bereavement of a family member, a friend or a beloved pet is never an easy process to go through but is unfortunately unavoidable at some point in life. The loss of a loved one is definitely one of life’s most stressful events and can often cause you a major emotional crisis, although people may have different ways to cope with the grief. Mourning is however the natural grieving process we all go through to accept and deal with a loss.
The Stages of Grief: Also Called the 7 Stages of Grief
Grief is the normal response to the loss of a loved one. Grief presents itself in different forms such as; emotional response to loss, physical, cognitive, behavioral, social, cultural, spiritual and philosophical dimensions. The 7 stages of grief in UK, USA and Australia include:
Shock and Denial - 1st stage of grief Hearing about the death of a loved one can be difficult; most people usually react by denying the reality of the loss, so as to avoid the pain. Shock and denial are natural in the grieving process especially if the death was sudden or unexpected. However, the most important thing to remember about the grieving process is that it takes time.
Pain and Guilt - 2nd stage of grief Feeling responsible or regretful for a perceived offence whether real or imaginary is part of the grieving process. You may start to feel guilty about something you said or something you should have done for the deceased that you may even desire to go back in time and do some things over again.
Anger and bargaining - 3rd stage of grief Anger is another stage in the grieving process where the bereaved usually question why is this happening to them. Some resent themselves for the inability to change the situation and others even attempt to ask God to return their departed loved ones in exchange for a good deed.
Depression, reflection and loneliness - 4th stage of grief At this stage in the grieving process, one may withdraw or isolate themselves from people. As the pain of losing a loved one begins to fade, you may be filled emptiness or loneliness and the need to isolate yourself on purpose because it feels like no one understands. Grief makes you reflect on all the things you did with your loved one and brings back all past memories.
The upward turn - 5th stage of grief Although it’s hard to imagine life without your dear one, it gets better with time and the grief is not permanent. Slowly by slowly, it becomes easier to deal with the loss and you start to feel better without even realizing it.
Reconstruction and working through grief - 6th stage of grief This is the stage in the grieving process where you'll start to work your way through the aftermath of losing a loved one. You might find yourself reorganizing your life to adjust to the loss or even dealing with financial costs from the funeral arrangements among other things.
Acceptance and hope - 7th stage of grief Acceptance doesn’t mean pretending that the loss ever happened; it means that you start to talk about it freely, and you're able to think about your loved one without being overcome by pain and grief. Life will obviously not be the same, but you will have the precious memories of your loved one to help you through it all. Keep in mind that the time spent in each stage of grief is different for everyone, so don’t feel pressured to feel better soon because someone else said so. Instead, surround yourself with people that love and support you.
How to Deal with Depression after the Loss of a Loved One
After facing a loss and during the grief process, it is important for the grieving person to have a solid emotional support system to help with the recovery. Family members and close friends can greatly help but there are also support groups, community organizations, and mental health professionals that exist around.
Some of the existing solutions that help people in UK, USA or Australia deal with the grief of losing a loved one include:
Joining a support group where members share personal experiences and give each other emotional support and relevant tips on how to cope with the grieving process.
Adopting a routine that includes more of the things you love such as sports, healthy eating and travel. This helps to keep your mind off a departed loved one.
Challenging negative thinking by keeping a list of the things/memories that you are thankful. This encourages a positive attitude and numbs the pain caused by grief.
What is Death Consulting after a Person Passes Away and Why it is Important?
When a person passes away, there are various matters that should be considered and addressed in conjunction with an attorney; it will also require the involvement of the surviving family members. Some of these processes include:
Addressing funeral arrangements and related costs Funeral arrangements start with registering a death and acquiring the Death Certificate. You can then decide on whether to use a funeral director or not and whether to bury or cremate the deceased. It is important to crosscheck for if the deceased had a prepaid funeral plan or any other benefits that cover expenses of the funeral arrangements.
The review and understanding of previously signed estate planning documents This applies in case the deceased had a business and there is need to discuss transition. It requires a durable power of attorney, a Will or trust with beneficiaries and a letter of intent that defines what should be done with a specific asset after. Such letters usually detail the deceased’s preferred funeral arrangement process.
Addressing the division and securing of the personal belongings These include photos, furniture, jewelry and clothes among other things that are usually not accounted for in a Will. The Executor of the Will is responsible for deciding who gets what.
Complying with tax requirements Final individual income tax returns of a deceased are prepared in the same way as in when they were alive. All income up to the date of death must be reported and all credits and deductions to which the deceased is entitled may be claimed.
Existing Ways and Products for Memorial after a Cremation or a Cemetery Burial
Modern families today are embracing cremation funeral arrangements as opposed to traditional burial. A case in point, 77% of all funerals in the UK are cremations rather than burials, in Canada and Australia this takes up about 68.4% whereas some states in the USA such as Nevada and Washington have a rate as high as 76%.
Cemetery burial is a method of final disposition where a deceased is placed into the ground. It can be held at home, in a churchyard, cemetery, and woodland burial sites or at sea. Burial funeral arrangements include short readings, prayers and scattering of soil or flowers onto the coffin. Cemetery burial requires both a burial certificate/green form and a burial plot application form.
The cost of cemetery burial in Canada is approximately $9000; the average cost in the UK is £4,271. In Australia, the fee rises to $15,000 for a burial complete with casket and flowers whereas in the USA, cemeteries charge roughly $7000 to $9000.